15.
The other day, I set out to make a list of things I would have liked to accomplish. It was an exercise in self loathing. There was so much that I had wanted to do, a bit too much actually, by the time I was knocking on the dreaded thirties...
...I had to be the Prime Minister of Pakistan, and set the house right. I had to be the greatest Military Commander the world had ever seen, and would have gone down in the historian's records as the person who had liberated Kashmir, Palestine, and all the other beleaguered people of the world. I had to be the person who would win Urdu's first (and maybe the second and the third) Nobel Prize for Literature, and if I won a couple for Peace and Economics, so much the better. I was to be the greatest athlete the country would have produced, and the most articulate dashing young man to come out of the continent. I was also to be what today Bill Gates is, cheating bugger - stole my idea, and was to be the greatest son of the continent, the nation, the country and the couple who brought me into this world. I was to be the bestest of friends, and the funniest of humorists. Lofted unrealistic ideas, you might say, but hey! I was 15, a dreamer, and a loser. At least, I am not 15 anymore.
However, this was not the list of accomplishments-in-waiting that had set me on the long dark path to self loathing. Had this been the list, yours truly would have added "The Late" or "Allah Bakhshey" to his name by now. The accomplishments-in-waiting are no less daunting though, when looked at from the perspective of a fat, bald, bespectacled, 30-here-I-come narcisisst wanna be, and slightly more realistic than he was at 15 under-achiever (Ahem!). It is certainly more do-able though, see if you agree with me...
- Get a degree in Business Administration from a recognized institute.
- Get another degree in a totally new descipline, Computers/Psychology/Philosophy/Mathematics...
- Learn a new Language - Spanish or Mandarin.
- Be a good son.
- Learn Swimming.
- Learn Riding.
- Learn Shooting.
- Learn Flying an aeroplane.
- Get in Shape.
- Get a new job.
- Read.
- Write.
- Be the nicest guy around.
- Win a Million.
- Not lose a Million.
- Pay off the Bank.
- Get a third degree (Not the one Pakistan police is known for)
Call it the three Year Plan, but it should keep me busy for six. Doable? Whaddaya say?
... or am I still 15?